In Loving Memories

A couple of weeks ago, a friend of mine passed away. He is not a very close friend of mine, but we went through high school together as classmates. We played hockey for the school team together.

It was around 10 p.m. on Wednesday, 7th of March, when I receive an SMS from Fariz saying that Nicholas has passed away, and the reason for the death is unknown. I was shocked, obviously. Whenever someone you know passes away, you can’t help but to be shocked.

On Thursday, at college, I received an SMS from Jim saying “Have you heard? Nicholas just passed away, apparently suicide.” I thought it was shocking enough to hear that he passed away. But, suicide just elevated it onto a whole new level.

Suicide, death at one’s own will. It’s a scary thought. Most of us disagree with the idea of suicide; let it be because of our religion or because of our principles. Some agree. Some say it is a better way of dying.

At that point, my mind was very much disturbed. To know someone who has committed suicide is not the same as just knowing he has passed away. It’s different.

That weekend, I met Zull during football, and he hitched a ride with me back home. While we were on our way back, he asked me whether I’ve heard about Nicholas or not. I gave a little nod. He continued, he said that Nicholas converted into a Muslim, and he found out so through bulletins where he read that Nicholas was also known as Mohd. Haziq. He told me that Nicholas and his uncle converted into Muslims.

I asked him whether it was suicide or not. He said that no one really knows the real story behind the death. Some say he fell off, some say it was suicide. Regardless of how inconclusive this may be, I hope it was not suicide. If it is true that he converted into a Muslim, my prayers are with him and I do hope that it was not suicide. I hope his soul rests in peace.

Nicholas Ng. In school, he’s not a saint, I have to say. Among teachers, he is often perceived as the naughty boy. But he has a good heart, a very kind heart. He was good with people, everyone has nothing against him. Everyone liked him. He’s that person, the people person.

Every time I think about his death, I remember the time when we beat La Salle in our hockey tournament and how he led the celebrations after the match. It was just amazing running across the field holding a line, hand in hand, towards the crowd and lifting each others’ hands in victorious spirit. I can still taste how sweet that victory was. The victory was ours, and he was very much a part of us.

After school, he worked at Deli France. I bumped into him while I was lost amidst the pastries. We said our hellos and we caught up on things. It was refreshing. He was still that same happy person, that same people person. That was last time I saw him.

He was a good man. May his soul, rest in peace. We’ll remember you, Nick, in loving memories.

~ by azlanmalek on March 18, 2007.